With Halloween just passed and Christmas lurking around the corner, it sure does keep the general public on their toes, shopping and what I would hope be, having a good time. But for many, people seem to have lost touch with their fun and carefree side, their inner child you might call it.

Over the past couple of years it has become more and more apparent that Ebenezer Scrooge is not merely a fictitious character, no, he is lurking in the inner nooks and crannies of everyday people that wander the street. He lurks in snide remarks and he roams around the busy, wet and cold streets that shoppers trudge through to buy their festive goods. And what’s more is that he lurks in the bodies of twenty-somethings. You may say, “That’s not true, young people love Christmas, they all go and get drunk!” True as it may be that student unions across the country, nay, the world, arrange Christmas themed nights and Noddy Holder pumps out of every other bar in the run up to Christmas, but as I have found out, much of the comments tend to be, “It’s only fun when you’re a kid,” or even more heart breakingly “I’m just not that bothered with Christmas anymore.” Many people can rightfully argue that it has turned into a commercial holiday, in a way yes I agree, stores do take advantage of shoppers and embellish in their 3 for 2 Christmas gift offers, but I feel that the message of Christmas and what it brings is far greater. It’s what you choose to believe and who you choose to channel your thoughts to.

I admit it. I love Christmas. I love it, love it, love it. And no, I’m not embarrassed about it at all. I do everything Christmas related, put up the Christmas tree and decorate it, decorate the house, get my advent calendar, and I still put up my Christmas stocking which I have had since I was 9. I’d quite happily have Christmas music blaring out, singing carols and pulling crackers. Why? Because it’s the time of year which is fun, where people who haven’t seen each other all year round come together to celebrate Christmas and to be with each other, to enjoy each others company and to even keep an eye on Uncle Ted in case he gets drunk again. And not forgetting that I am a Christian, to me, it’s celebrating change, salvation and hope. The hope in salvation, the hope in something bigger than us who loves us, so much so that three wise men trekked across the country to meet a little baby. And Mary gave birth without any form of painkillers, I think that’s a feat in itself.

Yes, it’s an expensive time of year, but if you manage your money accordingly, present hunt early, and give cheerfully, then it’s not such a bore. I love being able to hunt out that extra special present for a friend, boyfriend or family member, knowing that it’s not just going to be yet another present heading for ebay or the charity shop, but something that they’ll enjoy, get use out of and cherish. Apart from birthdays, Christmas is the only time of year that you can officially (and know that most of the country will be doing it too) be generous, have fun and have a good time.

Although opposing themes, Halloween and Christmas (and birthdays too) mean you can get in touch with your inner child, indulge in seasonal fun and immerse yourself in light heartedness. It’s the time of year where adults don’t have to worry about being so adult, it’s about sharing that fun and excitement with your children that you had when you were a kid. It crushes me to see that the Scrooge epidemic is not only prevalent in older people, but in the young too. Some haven’t even reached 30 and they don’t enjoy Christmas! It’s not about trying to keep up appearances, it’s about enjoying the time you have with each other and celebrating. Whether they are good or bad memories the most prominent memories people have are of big occassions and celebrations, and that my friends include Christmas. Sometimes it’s about what you put into it that results on what you get out of it. And remember, Scrooge didn’t stay a ‘scrooge’ for very long, even he managed to change his ways.

Last week I spent time teaching drama in a private school in Kent, although I am hugely enthusiastic on performance, theatre, acting and the likes I’ve always been a little bit hesitant to go into teaching. I’ve always wanted to give myself some time to learn more about the craft, to make my way in more performances whether it be on screen or treading the boards in theatre, and as I found growing up, the teachers that I was in awe of were teachers who had gone out and done it before coming to the classroom. I find there are a certain type of teacher (not all, but some) who never leave education. That is to say they grow up going to school, get their education, go to university and then straight back to school to teach, thus rendering them having never left the education system.

I found last week that a lot of what I taught, directed and gave advice on came not only from my education (where I have learnt a lot from), but it also came from my performance work and experience. It came from being ON stage or in front of the camera and even from people I’d met, worked with and what I learnt from them. It became valuable advice and gave the students wonderful anecdotes as well as examples of where practices, directing and acting had come from. It gave me something to relate to and the students too, proving exciting and interesting for them, and practical and warming for me too.

Like many people out there growing up in school, my school life was lit up by those teachers that went the extra mile, that enjoyed what they did and enjoyed the people that they were teaching it too. My school life was also shadowed by teachers who resented their job and where they were working, and unfortunately shadowed by one particular teacher who was not qualified in what she was teaching.

I was lucky that while I went to ‘regular’ school I also went to a performing arts school on weekends. This was how I gained much of my first professional working experience as a performer. Let me state for the record that I love performance and everything that comes with it, from working backstage, to creating the costume to learning lines and smelling the lovely old musty smell of a small fringe theatre, even if theres no heating. I can’t really remember the first time I decided that this was the industry I wanted to go in, I suppose it found me. Anyway, I digresss. So, as a teen I went to school, did all the subjects that I knew I had to do knowing that on the weekend I would be working away at my craft and doing something that I wanted to take with me into my old age. So, when I went into my GCSE’s (exams for those who don’t know, that you do over two years from 14-16 years of age) and having chosen drama as one of my subjects, was very quickly introduced to my drama teacher. Or should I say, English teacher posing as drama teacher. Although English and Drama may go hand in hand, may I just add this, English and Drama are not the same subject. I can easily say that at this age and throughout my time in that class, I learnt nothing that I did not already know from my performing arts school, (and from the performance work I received there which I did at the same time). I tried my best, and went along as best I could, but I did not enjoy that class, and let’s be honest, it’s difficult being taught by someone teaching a subject that they have to read from a book in order to teach. Advice wasn’t given, direction was amiss and practitioners were barely mentioned. Over the two years, half our classes were meant to be on the theory part of drama, this is to say stage design, blocking, direction, practitioners and comparisons to plays. We had three classes one month before our exam. I may not be a professional teacher but that’s simple maths…and common sense.

This is not a ‘Look at me and how much I know,’ piece, not in the slightest. What I did learn from that teacher is that I would never want to be like her. Ever. I figured that if I were to go into teaching it would be because I wanted to, that I was passionate about what I was teaching and knew how to teach it. Those two years were frustrating to say the least and leaving the class to go and study it in a more specialist course was refreshing.

As much as I could sit here and type at how awful the teacher was, there is one other factor that I have to mention. That factor is the education standards. If this had been the case in Maths, Science or History, the teacher would not have been allowed to teach. But as drama or theatre studies is often seen by schools as an ‘add-on’ subject and deemed by many as either ‘not a real subject’ or ‘unnecessary’ that more often than not teaching like this is allowed.

My time in teaching last week was a wonderful insight and relief. The drama teacher that I worked with was not only passionate, but hard working, exciting and endlessly creative and dedicated to what she was doing. It made me realise that drama is taken seriously in other schools, and the respect for this particular drama teacher stretched for miles. Teachers were inspired and in awe of how far this woman would go and what she could create and do. How amazing is that? How amazing is that to be said of anyone or any teacher no matter what field? My unfortunate experience may be only too real for me and others in schools out there, but there are teachers in non-performing arts schools that do an extraordinary job.

My only problem is that even if drama is slowly but surely being embraced more across the educational field in secondary schools is that resources are still limited. Not that you need a great deal of material posessions in order to teach drama, a black box studio, learning resources for practitioners, plays and performances can go along way, you don’t have to have a fully stocked costume department (even if it would be quite nice) can really make a difference. But it’s the teacher at the centre of it that makes a huge difference. It’s the teacher that can influence the student, either make them love it or hate it, engage them or distract them. But in so many cases, to be able to get a great teacher can also mean having to use some of the budget to provide resources, props and the appropriate space for them, which unfortunately having only recently recovered from an economic crisis, art council cuts and school cuts makes it all the more difficult. Which always makes me wonder if drama/theatre studies is still being taken as a serious subject. Many may say it’s not as important as science or english, but it’s important to those who want to go into that industry, who want to work in the many sectors of the performing arts whether it’s backstage, on stage, directing, producing, writing or design. You wouldn’t teach maths without books for the students to write in so why would you teach drama to students without being able to refer to resources on practitioners or the appropriate work space?

My time at the school proved incredibly valuable to me. The teachers I worked with were supportive and enjoyed their work (I came to the conclusion long ago that not many teachers did), the students were receptive and listened to me! Having been able to use and reflect upon my own experiences to help and influence students proved to be a wonderful gift and experience for me, and without worrying about turning into a socially retarded ‘the school is my world’ angry teacher I certainly do think that at some point I would consider taking up teaching in the future. Right now I would like to gain more experience before diving in, I think that would be beneficial to me and to the students. The prominence of the creative arts is becoming an important part of the education system, but it has some way to go, and I hope one day I’ll be there to see it.

It has come to my attention this week, of a new programme called “Lip Service,” currently being shown on BBC Three. Now, I haven’t quite had the chance to watch it yet, but as many comments, emails and messages that I keep receiving I apparently look like Frankie from the show. Once is a little odd but I didn’t really think about it, twice, well I considered that a conincidence but since I asked friends and family, it’s all become a resounding yes!

I decided to look up my potential doppelganger, who’s real life name is, Ruta Gedmintas, and I can’t quite see it personally. I don’t know if it’s just me and as individuals we don’t tend to see similarities or our own characteristics in other people and vice versa, but I can’t really see it. Although it’s quite lovely to have a fellow tall person on television, and that other people think I am all over the wonderful telly box, I can’t help but think, “It’s not me!”

It’s bizarre to receive messages exclaiming that they thought they saw me on telly and how similar we look and in a strange fashion I feel like I’m almost being cheated out of my own image. Yes, I am aware that this is a ridiculous, selfish and more than likely strange way to view this but being born as the only person with my particular face and body and without a twin, I’ve never met nor seen anyone on the telly who looks like me and now I have this person. Even Lip Service is following me on Twitter! What do I do with this? How do I react? Ruta Gedmintas is by no means ugly (and no I am not just saying that because she is meant to look like me), but in some strange way I feel slightly torn, do I try and attempt some sort of contact or embrace the new doppelganger, or do I run away and I hide? I’ve never thought about this before because I never thought that this would happen. Perhaps this is how twins feel on a regular basis. Admittedly, if she were to become hideously famous I could strike up a career as a look-a-like! I wouldn’t have to change much.

It’s a strange concept and feeling, this doppelganger business.

Our Views and Need for Documentaries

Since my last two posts have been on subjects that have been presented through documentaries I’ve been pondering the idea of documentaries, how they’re presented and how they influence us, back our own ideas up or even challenge them.

I, personally love documentaries, but I have to say that as much as I love them, I don’t particularly agree or enjoy documentaries based on strong biased, dismissive and angry documentaries. I feel that these documentaries and their makers need to be able to keep an open mind and be able to explore all possible avenues to make a plausible, researched and well presented documentary. This is not to say that any anti-holocaust documentary is wrong, of course I do not uphold or entertain the thought or people with the idea that the holocast was anything but a hideous example of human evil. But what I do want to emphasise is the use of creating and using a strong case for an argument that is suitable for an audience, whether they be educated or not in the particular area. If you are part of a debate team you would be expected to produce a strong case on your level of topic and opinion, not ‘I hate this or these people because they’re so stupid,’ which I find is the case for many bloggers.

For me documentaries are there to educate, reveal new or previously hidden truths, to act as the viewers insight and provoke new ideas of thought, attitude as well as entertain.

As part of a western society we all seem to have become immersed in documentaries, having that need and desire to go ‘one step further’ and to indulge our curiosity – even if it did kill the cat. And it’s come out in a variety of mediums including under cover journalism, ‘in your face’ blunt and bold journalism, and talking to the people for first hand accounts.  Documentaries are about breaking that barrier between us ‘the viewer’, and the reality of things unseen. As they say, don’t take things on face value. And let’s face it, ‘real life’ is big news these days, whether its celebrities on glossy magazines, or on TV, for example, Big Brother.

One particular series that I have enjoyed recently is the Ross Kemp on Gangs series which to me, has unleashed a whole, underground, raw and unadulterated view into gang life across the world. Not having been exposed to a great deal of gang culture, attitudes and why they exist Ross Kemp certainly looks at the subject from all angles even though gang culture is not something he agrees with, which is the basis for the series. What attracted me to the series and to keep watching throughout was not only the extreme subject, but the first hand accounts from both sides. Up until recently documentaries were made to argue one side or the other, not both.

Another example of documentaries I’ve enjoyed include the Mindshock and Bodyshock documentaries from Channel 4 shown a few years ago, Hitler’s Bodyguard, Aileen Wuornos: The Selling of a Serial Killer by Nick Broomfield who has done several very well produced documentaries, (I have to admit I do enjoy watching documentaries on WW2 and the Titanic) just to name a few.

There are a huge array of documentaries out there to challenge, question, provoke and seek out the truth, unveil the hidden evidence and even to entertain on a variety of subjects, and the list continues to grow with hundreds of channels world wide creating new and innovative and educated documentaries.

If you have some documentaries that you would like to share please feel free to comment.

The Questions That Taunt My Insomnia

The Shrinking World of L. Ron Hubbard

As we all know there are a lot of strong feelings and reactions to the ‘religion’ that is Scientology. Black or white. You’re either against or your for. But when BBC’s Panorama documentary came out last week, “The Secrets of Scientology,” we found out that there are more ‘grey area’ people. People who still consider themselves Scientologists but are not part of the Church of Scientology, or rather David Miscavige’s Church of Scientology.

In the past few days I’ve been doing some more research on other people’s views on Scientology and the Church that it has become, I’ve done this through various blogs, websites, forums and videos. There seems to be a bigger uprising than the world anticipated. Out through the cracks are reformation organisations and groups hailing the change of Scientology, revealing the secrets, thoughts and actions of what has happened to people.

Whats more is that more and more videos are coming through the medium of Youtube, one of which has caught my attention is a very early documentary “The Shrinking World of L.Ron Hubbard,” filmed in 1968. It consists of an interview and a short investigation and explanation in Scientology and it’s role. The interview with L.Ron Hubbard does not reveal a huge amount, but the film makers were able to film auditing sessions, people who had achieved the status of ‘clear’ which in no way would John Sweeney have been able to do. It also unveils the first members of Sea Org, members of Scientology aboard a ship, with L. Ron Hubbard, their ‘commodore’ all living, working together (for little or no money) in the name of Scientology which we are told means ‘the study of  knowingness’. Described as a charmer, Hubbard is by no means an aggressive defender and creator of the faith, but nor is he totally enlightened to those around him who are not believers. There doesn’t seem to be a bridge between Scientologists and non Scientologists. Which is you are trying to be a growing faith you would have thought would be in place. Instead the Sea Org members are trained to be the ultimate members of Scientology and are kept from others, a practice which is still in use today as show in “The Secrets of Scientology”. The reporter in “The Shrinking World of L.Ron Hubbard,” is obviously disturbed, confused and certainly not convinced, even having met the creator of this new religion.

Seemingly a new religion and a new revelation, Scientology has been made known to us for sometime, but it is only now that it has been brought to the media and to our own living rooms. It’s even become a household name, whether it is reveered or not. In 1968 there were obvious signs of uneasiness, confusion but also an attraction to this mysterious religion and yet nothing was said or done. I suppose without exactly breaking any obvious laws publicly it is difficult to put a stop to something you don’t agree with. But what does surprise me that it’s taken so long for a reformation to come around. I’ve never been particularly exposed to Scientologists or the religion so maybe it is difficult for me to be able to put down a strong statement on the right and wrongs of Scientology, but what I do know and what is happening now is that people are ready for change. I am confused as to why it’s taken so long for people to say “No,”. If something is wrong, why are people reluctant to stand up for what is right? Which begs the next question, why are people afraid? We know that something is going on because people have left and have confessed. But then so many people are defending the faith. What’s going on? I accept there are going to be opposition, different views and experiences, but this is a diverse range of reactions. We all know the difference of what is right and wrong, what the difference is is our perception of right and wrong, and I can see that what may have been put into place to help those, unfortunately has been used against them. And it is this that has been what so many people are ready to stand up and change.

So if Scientology was exposed in 1968 as a confusing, strange and somewhat encompassing religion with no straight answers why on earth ha sit taken this long for it to be exposed to the media?

What I would like to do is open this post to debate, what I know of this subject comes from media and my own research, so I’m open to other views, thoughts, questions, and personal experiences of Scientology. I’m not looking for a Scientology bashing session, visit other sites for that. So please comment, ask and share on this topic, I’m throwing the doors open.

The subject, even the word, “Scientology,” wreaks havoc, suspicion and general un-easyness among the pubic. Partly I feel from the extreme behaviour, the money in ‘fixed donations’ received from high profile celebrities and the fact that not quite anyone really knows what “Scientology” is about. The strange stories of Lord Xenu being the foundation of people across the world leaves the mind a little confused. The fact that some people talk about this ‘Lord Xenu’ and those who don’t confuse me more. If it’s apart of the religion why wouldn’t you talk about it? Well according to Panorama you need to get to a certain level of Thetan in order to learn about this as you may not be spiritually, mentally and physically ready for the revelation. In my experience you become ‘ready’ through learning. Even in my own research of Scientology I cannot find a direct answer as to what it’s all about, I can’t seem to get any answers, which leaves me feeling confused and suspicous. Why can’t I get a straight forward answer? The only facts we, as the public, seem to be able to get are those that are from the media. Yet so many people seem to praise and edify the religion that is “Scientology”. Is Scientology a religion and a way of self improvement and living or the estranged writings of a failed science fiction writer?

Having watched the UK’s Panorama documentary, “The Secrets Of Scientology,” the follow up documentary to “Scientology and Me,” from 2007, answered some questions but also brought to light some of the people we do not see. In every religion, race, country, interest or subject there are going to be extremists, there are always going to be fanatics, hence where the noun “fan,” comes from. And the extremists of Scientology have certainly got the attention of the media. High profiled celebrities such as Tom Cruise, John Travolta and Juliette Lewis, to name but a few, are associated with Scientology, and certainly Tom Cruise comes top of the list. In the past 2-3 years Tom Cruise appeared to be the face of Scientology, unfortunately to his demise, because of his constant veneration of Scientology production companies, paying him millions and millions started to withdraw. Now, we do not hear so much about this religion. Scientology is certainly an expanding business and has the backing of the rich and famous, but it also appears to have the backing of the ‘average joes’. As seen in “The Secrets of Scientology,” documentary, John Sweeney travels to LA and talks to some of the people entering and exiting one of the Scientology Centres, and yes we see everyday people claiming that Scientology has helped them to develop, face challenges and increase their productivity. So, these people are saying that they’re being helped. So, if it’s helping people what’s all the suspicion about? They claim that they’re doing better than ever.

What intrigued me by the programme was not only that was it one mans journey into the world of this religion, he was accompanied by a former Celebrity Auditor, Marty Rathbun and Mike Rinder, former speaker for the Church of Scientology in America. These are certainly people who had access to everyone and everything and saw with their own eyes the unadulterated, inner workings of the Church of Scientology. They are now at the forefront of the reformation of Scientology. Note that though they were separate from the Church of Scientology, they were still Scientologists. Who saw that coming? Because they decided to leave, they were in a form, ‘excommunicated’, they were not allowed to be on any Church or building premises owned by Scientology, but they still believed in the use and practice of Scientology. What they didn’t agree with was the actions and the management of the church, having seen families torn apart, including Mike Rinders own family, manipulation, and what many sources, including exmembers of the church call bullying. What is happening is a reformation, a change, a chance to rebuild what has been tainted. Whether people believe that what has happened is true or not is their own perogative, but the evidence is tantamount.

The documentary was a refreshing approach, applying the idea that not all Scientologists are the same. Not all Scientologists are David Miscavige’s or power hungry and controlling individuals. John Sweeney meets, interviews and converses with people who still consider themselves Scientologists but who have been hurt, rejected, manipulated and bullied by those in the church. And quite frankly, they ARE normal people. They are people who were coached, coerced and manipulated by those who had authority and had an evil attitude, but are now living a new life, repairing and mending what has happened and making a new life for themselves and the family they have rescued and formed. If a religion, support group or any form of self improvement or self help is meant to be just that then things like this should not happen. Yes, there are fanatics within the Church of Scientology, but there are some who are not, and that’s the reality. What I learned from the programme is that so many people working for this church and branches thereof, including the newly broadcasted Sea Org, are restrained from those around them, their own thoughts and their own rights. Amy Scobee, a former employee of the church of Scientology was confined in their own makeshift community, not allowed to interact with others who were not Scientologists and emotionally blackmailed to stay and threatened with their family, the threat of endangering their spiritual life and their future lives. Now, what confuses me is that there are Scientology and Dianetics buildings all over the place with Scientologists talking to ‘normal people’, so why were they restricted? If theywant to spread, take on new members and make more money, how can you do that by cutting people off? If their intent is to help people, why do they hold people back? It’s this that scares me more than anything else. Threats cause anxiety, illness and fear not respect and productivity, and not to the extent in which so many exmembers of the church have talked about. 

All in all, and with the help of Mike Rinder and Marty Rathbun, John Sweeney managed to make a more open minded documentary on the inside issues, results and consequences of Scientology and those within it. “Scientology and Me,” certainly warned the public of the evils, but this new documentary certainly got to the heart of the people who had been there, seen it and even done it. But this time there’s a change in the air, there’s a point of reformation and help for those who were hurt. And it’s told us that not all Scientologists are the same, which I think we were all guilty of branding all of them with the same brush.

N.B. This is my interpretation of the programme and is not designed to offend.

The 1990′s gave birth to a new kind of pop group, none the world had ever seen before. The Spice Girls.

I’m not ashamed to say that I was a massive fan of them. Most pre-teenage girls were fans of them. I bought the CDs, the videos, my mum even took me to see the film. It had Meatloaf and Richard E Grant in it and they weren’t afraid of being silly.Whatever was Spice Girl orientated, I saved up my pocket money and bought it. Many of you reading this may turn and cringe at what I’m saying, and to an extent I do. I was obsessed. I literally had seen them (on TV), been there in the conundrum of Spice Girl fame, and bought the t-shirt. It had Mel B on it. 

Although I don’t listen to their music anymore and they’re all living in separate corners of the world, what they meant to me growing up was more than music. And there hasn’t been a girl band quite like them since. You may not have liked them to start off with but you can’t disagree with me on the fact that no pop group has been able to be like them.

You see before I hit the dear old years of teenage-dom, my life plodded on just like any other kid. Music was music, tv was tv, I knew what I liked and what I didn’t. I went to school, I walked home with friends and the awkward moments of life in puberty hadn’t quite hit yet. I was quite content. When the Spice Girls first arrived I didn’t quite take full notice of them, but as their fame rose to newer heights I started to pay a little more attention. These weren’t just girls singing, doing the same routine dances and flirting with presenters, they launched the phrase ‘Girl Power’. Girl Power? Can girls have it? What is this new phenomenon? Girls…and Power in the same sentence? Suddenly I didn’t just see a bunch of girls in a pop band singing on tv I saw five women who had fun, sang, jumped around, embarassed presenters and did it without the aid of drugs, alcohol and being nasty, they were having pure, unadulterated fun. To me, the Spice Girls did more than sing, they got me into action. These girls flew around the world, sang on the most prestigious stages, wore wonderful costumes and were cheeky. It was harmless fun and they promoted girls, femininity and being an individual. After all none of the Spice Girls look alike. And suddenly I thought, well if they can do it, why can’t I?

For a long time growing up I realised that I wasn’t the most ‘girly’ girl at school but I wasn’t a tomboy either. I was happy of ‘getting stuck in’ and didn’t bother me too much if I got dirty playing outside. I didn’t have the ‘boys smell’ mentality, if you were nice I was happy to be friends, whether you were a girl or boy. But I liked the idea of seeing the pretty dresses in stores that one day I would be able to wear. It never bothered me until I went to secondary school, where suddenly puberty, a mass onslaught of new and older pupils suddenly seems to encroach on everything you do.

Love them or hate them, the Spice Girls didn’t fall out of clubs pissed, having fights or showing their knickers. They boasted confidence, excitement, spontanaeity and a huge empire! Suddenly the business world wasn’t a male dominated place it was a girl dominated place and these girls were not shy. They showed girls like me that you didn’t need to be scared, that you can stand up and be counted, you can have fun and be successful, no matter what you wear, do or like. Each girl was different, Victoria was famous for her pout and her quietness, Mel C was strong and sporty, Geri was oulandish, Emma was cute and sweet, Mel B was loud and lairy, they literally represented every type of girl out there. And that’s why I think so many people adored them.

I find that so many singers, bands and celebrities are famous because of who they’re dating, what they’ve said and what sex scandal they’re got into. The world of celebrity is filled with kiss and tell stories, binge drinking and bitching. It may be a quick way of getting rich but I can’t imagine it to be very fulfilling. As much as fame and fortune may be appealing I would never want to be known as the woman who slept with someone elses husband or bitched continuously about someone else on television, or for even drink driving. Morally I object to this and everything you do has consequences. At the end of the day it’s not just you that you end up hurting, it’s those around you.

Despite talent shows on TV, which have brought some talent back into the public eye, the world of fame and celebrity still has a long way to go. Which is why I still favour the Spice Girls to many other ‘acts’ that we see these days. Those who are fighting addictions, I sincerely wish all the best to defeating their addiction, to those who still favour kiss and tell stories, publicity stunts and such like I hope they end up investing their money into something which is more productive and challenging.

The Questions That Taunt My Insomnia

Awkward, Elongated Femmes

I write this entry on the ever commented, ever mentioned tedium that is my height. I am a woman, but not just any kind of a woman. I am a rare kind. For I am Eleni, the female of 6 feet tall. I am also, pale, so much so, I feel that sometimes I reflect the light. And in fact, when I said this as a joke once a woman turned to me with full pity on her face and replied, “Oh, really?” No!

Yes I may not be your average minority but I am one, and I seem to be fairly alone in the womens battle that is tallness. All through my life it has been commented on by people of all sorts of backgrounds, shapes, sizes and cultures that my height is odd, and unfortunately I have only ever met around three women who are as tall as me.

Evolution states that we are getting taller as humans, but only the boys seem to be able to catch up to my height, and I’m not exactly bizarrely tall. I’m only bizarrely tall for a woman, but not for humankind as a whole. Which is one thing I feel I need to state, believe it or not, whether you mention my height to me…or not…I know that I am tall. Yes, I know, hard to believe isn’t it? How on earth should I know that I am tall? Well, it’s a bit hard to not notice when you live in a body like mine let alone have people constantly point and say, “My goodness, you’re tall aren’t you?”. No way! Oh my Lord I’m tall? Where did that extra height come from? I was only five foot five yesterday! No, dumbass, I am more than well aware of my height. And after all I believe it’s a great thing to have. I don’t think I should feel intimidated or ashamed of my height. It’s part of me, just like my eyes, ears, arms and legs. But people do feel the need to tell me, inform me and pass me a memo just to say, “You’re tall.” Here’s a memo I’d like to pass to all you lot out there. No s*** Sherlock.

In Singapore it was more than evident that I was not only taller than most people, but I was taller than the entire population of the city. And no, I did not go stomping around like Godzilla like some Japanese film reject. And no the fact that I was taller than most did not mean that the ‘weather up there’ was any different to the air you hobbits breathe a few inches down.

Which goes on to another point. No matter how original or funny you think you’re jokes are, believe me, I’ve heard them and so has every other tall person on the planet. You are not funny. Greg Davies demonstrates this very well on ‘Mock The Week’.

Us lovely, long-legged ladies should not be afraid of our height. Some are graceful, some are beautiful, some are athletic and others like me get tangled up in our height. I am an awkward tall lady who can at times be clumsy, but remember I can reach the things on the top shelf, you can’t.

“Enigmatically visual and narcissistically raw”

A production acting as a prequel to “Macbeth,” is a feat in itself. A well written piece with a magnificent grasp of old English and a natural conversational flow marks this production as a success.
The actors own grasp of the complex dialogue and the natural ebb and flow made this piece an enjoyment to watch. Unfortunately so many productions fail instantaneously in the true understanding of old English. Whereas to recreate it on stage in 21st century England constructs an otherwise intimidating piece into a well developed and well conceived piece finishing with the witches at the beginning of “Macbeth”.

Gloria Carreno’s use of characterisation and interaction of the characters has taken many leads from the original play. For example, the pure narcissism and eventually deadly ambition of Gruoch, the future Lady Macbeth played by Alexis Strum, literally spits venom and conceit upon others in a hellish ‘make way’ for the future King and Queen of Scotland. Gruoch’s son from her dead husband also leaves one to question further into the quote from the original play, “While it was smiling in my face, pluck’d my nipple from his boneless gums, and dash’d the brains out,” the sons fate was not quite revealed. Contrasted to her mother played by Maggie Robson, a far more visually and supernaturally wild, yet sensitive character, only serves as the future Lady Macbeth’s punch bag.

Julian Brown’s Macbeth, had charismatically sensitive words furtively equipped by his ever questioning thoughts leave the audience waiting for Lady Macbeth’s inevitable ‘kill’. Much like the lamb put to the slaughter. A Macbeth the audience can feel sympathy for, unlike the original. In a production full of dramatic irony the charming Joseph Law as the servant made way for some light hearted relief and also Lady Macbeth’s used lover.

The only problems arising from this performance were the lack of utilisation from the space. As often as it occurs in fringe theatre, the space (or lack thereof) can cause issues, but could have been easily solved with the use of tableau and lighting effects. A more detailed understanding of the space could see this performance soar further.

A Compexity of Modern Love

Part of Camden Fringe’s charm is the fact that anyone can see a production of any style, genre and mood. “Boys Don’t Cry,” performed at Camden Head, a small and limiting space, certainly didn’t keep the writing and characters restrained.

The themes carried in this piece, of love, romance and the shattered pieces of human fault held by Danny portrayed by Matthew Hattersley, made this an accessible and entertaining piece for the audience. The use of projector, mobile phone texting and live performance made this a modern and sophisticated piece with the potential to go further.

The relationships portrayed on stage kept this piece full of life and understanding. The remarkable fight for love, truth and most of all, forgiveness, is certainly a theme well explored by all participants of this piece and is finely executed to the audience. From the broken up couple that is Danny and Jess, to the saving grace of Sarah, this piece explores how love with all its complexities and our own human faults can not just break a relationship but hold us back from moving on.

A well researched and performed piece I found that the continuous black outs hindered the flow of this piece, which is such a shame as each person shone in their own right. A short rethink of the direction could have this show flowing more easily. I for one cannot wait for this Manchester based theatre company to come back again with another piece.